I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
She started howling at the moon. That was pretty much the deal breaker.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I have fence marks all over my body
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
