It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Note to self: Don't go home with a recent divorcee. Semen and tears.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
