Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
he kept farting in my kitchen and blaming it on the dog. then we went to wendy's and he spent twenty minutes in the bathroom. im pretty sure he shit his pants.
you should have known when you found out he drove a mini cooper not to hang out with him.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
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