My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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