this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
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