Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
operation harelip BJ is a go
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
Randomize
