just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
So that guy from plenty of fish has a lightning bolt tattooed on his face. I kinda feel like I HAVE to sleep with him now.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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