Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Randomize