even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
Stop inviting me to your birth control calender reminders...my job is to test its effectiveness, not know its schedule
Lmao sorry
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Randomize
