I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
We left an ass print on the piano.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
