put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
