yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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