we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
