Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Terrible idea I love it
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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