did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
