I hate your face
i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize