If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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