sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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