You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Randomize
