come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
At what point lastnight did a lens fall out of my glasses and nobody tell me?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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