Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
