she was so not down for the gang bang
I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
Randomize