I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I cant go through life without knowing what ginger pubes actually look like
I pour the whiskey from now on
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Randomize