Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize
