so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
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