jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
