Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
Randomize
