Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
