I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
Randomize
