wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I totally straight up jacked your pants. I am so sorry.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Randomize