Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
