She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
