just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
