That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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