I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
who knew my inner goddess was such a whore
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize
