It's like the Sean Connery of vaginas. You don't mess with it.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Randomize
