Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I found them on a couch next to the sidewalk screaming at cars with a megaphone. Kevin chased the mailman with a jello shot.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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