there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize