fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
I totally gave him head in sync to Beastie Boy's Sabotage playing in the background.
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
