We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
That's when you crack a 10am beer
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I went with plan f. get drunk and start a fire in my yard
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
Randomize
