i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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