I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
aaaannd alcoholism beats pride. it's like grown-up rock, paper, scissors
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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