New low: just hacked my moms facebook
i can't believe i had my finger in that
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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