in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
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