i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
Randomize
