He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
we just talked about our morning and what we were doing for the day and he handed me the addies and i took $50 out of my bra in front of a bunch of frat guys. so the mornings going really well
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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