she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Randomize
