You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Randomize
