You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize