you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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