haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
Randomize
