No awkward lesbian experiences without me
My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
Randomize
